The Land of the Undead | ארץ האל-מתים

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The Hebrew on the tombstone is the name of my maternal grandmother. Behind her is my maternal grandfather.

The first time we locked lips
Our faces grew close, slowly, like in a dream
Eyelids dropped; everything dimmed
A spotlight illuminated the scene
Right before we switched lungs
I peeked at your hankering
Your mouth opened in anticipation
My watch stopped ticking
You lowered your voice and half-raised eyelids
You wanted me more than I did
“This is the most intimate moment of my existence,” I realized
As your tongue traced my lip
“I can’t wait till next time,” you whispered –

I wake at night
Yet another dream
A fairy-tale-turned-reality-turned-nightmare
The final act of your film

In act one, you weren't in my aim
You chased me while I was hunting an old flame
Then I bumped into your sword
And fell before you noticed me in the horde

Your ambush changed the game
I laid limp in your arms, dreading blame
“Come closer,” you said, and gave me the Mark of Cain
Was that the moment you decided, “he will never see me again”?

The night I almost said “I’m in love with you”
I thought I’d have another chance
"Throw me a bone before you break my skeleton"
I cried, tracing your footprints in the sand

Why did you make the first step
Of a tango you didn't want to dance?
A quiet player never reveals their cards
I should’ve known you’d never dismiss your guards

The silence after your storm
In act two, the battlefield has lost its swarm
“You think I can’t handle the truth?” I roar
At tombstones and beds no longer warm
Lust slowed down our one-on-one
Now, time flies
Wars rage without a taunt from you
In the blink of an eye, I will die

Forget-me-nots wither. Seals hibernate
Gusts of grudge freeze graves
I rise above the ground; my gashes dry
Winter congeals the blood that you shed
"Give me a season before a lifetime alone"
I yell, but no voice comes out
Then it hits me
“I am in the land of the undead”

It is quiet here. And barren
Ghosts roam cemeteries, searching for the weapons that killed them
They scream into a void
No one licks their wounds
I never scratched your cheek
You tossed your axe and fled into the woods

You sucked the colour out of my world, and blamed the vacuum
I begged for scraps of your leftovers
Your "Yes" still echoes in my backroom
I waste my best words on your biography
Your name's still buried in my wallet
No one sees when you cry at an onsen

If you materialised, you would groan
“Aren’t you happy floating on your own?”
But the health of my flesh is none of your concern
None of your cheer, none of your pain

My social battery is low and it’s getting dark
The clock strikes twelve
Wolves bark
“Why did I fall in love with a stranger?”
Stars blinded me to the danger
My cemetery drifts away from your retreat
Into an ocean with pitch-black sleet

Act three sees me stranded
On an iceberg with gaunt seals
My guts blush the ice
My head drops to my heels
Ghosts swing axes and form cracks
The iceberg collides with a continent and begins to disappear
A snowstorm brought us together
But the desert is my place of origin
My frostbites boil into burns
“Did I ever hurt you?” I ask
“Am I a fiend?”

I wait for a hunter that is well-fed
An over-imaginative kid stuck on reverse
“I like you, I like you,” my head replays
I wish I could forget
The lies of our duet

You set my torch ablaze
Yet I will never be more than an ash in your fireplace
I'll grin and bear it like a good cub
Who knows their elder has chickened out
Your axe is too rusty for digging
My night is too long in this climate
Bereaved families
Daily murders
Realization dawns
My blood curdles

"I am starting to hate you a little"

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