One month in Busan 
Volunteering at a hostel 
Fast travel turned slow 
Cleaning in exchange for a bed 
 
For a month, it was my home 
In travel terms, it’s forever 
The same people everyday 
Friends for life? 
Afraid of the answer 
 
I gave more travel advice than I travelled 
Practically became guests’ go-to source 
Changed sheets and cleaned toilets 
Picked up vomit from the floor 
Drank more alcohol than in my adolescence 
Supermarkets instead of convenience stores 
Partying replaced slumber 
I went full days without spending a coin 
Didn’t manage to sightsee enough 
Alas 
Now it’s gone 
 
The connections I made were deep 
The connections I lost, a low blow 
Often, I was swamped with errands 
Travel plans, essays, chores, potential jobs 
The pictures show the high moments 
But the extreme lows outnumber them all 
 
Temples and beaches 
Museums and parks 
Heartbreak and disappointment 
Jealousy and loss 
The solid feeling of being invisible 
Being played with, ever a toy 
A month of efforts, tears, expectations 
I cry too much now 
Who would’ve thought 
If there’s one thing I hate, it’s mixed signals 
Confusing behavior, false hope 
Be honest with me, even if it crushes my spirit 
The alternative does so even more 
I long to find a space for myself 
Yet the world is off limits for my soul 
 
“Why are you alone?” I’m asked at a club 
I shrug; 
Apparently, here it’s uncommon 
My departure heralded the rainy season 
Everyday is a downpour 
 
A note from a friend makes me cry on the subway 
I miss them already 
Why does life have to go on? 
 
Next stop is Seoul Pride 
Should all go well 
I won’t be alone.